We believe your marriage is worth saving. But more importantly, our God does too. That said, let’s ignore that for a moment and just address some underlying issues.

There’s no evidence that unhappy people who divorce suddenly become happy. In fact, the opposite is true.

The chances are it’s not your spouse that’s the problem. Chance are (and this is where we lose most people because of pride), it’s you. In other words, if you’re not willing to deal with you 100%, how can you expect to heal your relationship.

It starts with you. And, your relationship with God.

One of the US’s top divorce researchers, and a licensed psychologist did a 25-year research study following 131 children of divorce. What she found is quite interesting. She said, “Twenty-five years after their parents’ divorce, children remembered loneliness, fear and terror! Adults like to believe that children are aware of their parents’ unhappiness, expect the divorce and are relieved when it happens. However, that is a myth; and what children actually conclude is if one parent can leave another, then they both could leave me. As a society we like to think that divorce is a transient grief, a minor upheaval in a child’s life. This is also a myth; and as divorcing parents go through transition, their children live in transition.”

So, I’m quick to tell husbands and wives to slow their role; take a moment and consider there’s more to this than your unhappiness. That doesn’t mean you should live in an unhealthy and unhappy marriage, or you should suffer. What it means is, for everyone’s sake, let’s look at how we can heal things instead of making it worse. And while not all marriages can be saved, it’s worth the try.

Not to mention, that you’ll likely regret it and it will continue to be a source of pain for your entire life. According to the National Fatherhood Initiative Marriage Survey (see fatherhood.org), more than three-fifths of divorcees said they wished they had worked harder to save their marriage.

The Institute for American Values found that there was no evidence that unhappily married adults who divorced were any happier than unhappily married people who stayed married, and that a full two-thirds of unhappily married spouses who stayed together reported that their marriages were happy five years later. Yeah, read that again. Those who divorced often regretted it and were still unhappy. Those who fought for it, even when it took time to bring the other spouse around, were eventually happy.

Why? Because when you work for something, you tend to get what you want.

The Apostle Paul tells us that what we focus on we become; if we focus on giving up, we’ll give up. If we choose to eliminate that nonsense from our minds, and choose to be our best today, there’s a substantial chance of repairing what sucks right now.

God has a plan for you. He wants you to succeed.

There’s a 7-Step Plan. Start now.